[Winnie:]
When a girl of common sense
Wants to make a competence,
It's a theme for thought intense
How she is to make it;
If she happens to prefer
Starting as a milliner,
There's a bonnet shop for her--
She has but to take it.
But what has she to do for it,
To do for it?
She has to snare a millionaire,
A Christian or a Jew for it,
To smile and say, "Perhaps some day,"
And then, of course, to stop!
Oh! it takes a lot before you've got
your little bonnet shop!
When a girl of high degree
Goes into society,
Richly married she would be
If she isn't silly;
So she makes the deadest set
At a sporting baronet,
Till he says, "I say, you bet,
That's a rippin' filly!"
And what has she to do for him,
To do for him?
She bets and smokes and laughs at jokes
That turn the "Pink Un" blue for him;
At Bridge she plays, and if she pays
Her necklace she must pop;
Oh! she has to go a trifle low
to get her bonnet shop!
When a lady sets her heart
On a leading social part,
She'll be smartest of the smart,
Greatest of successes;
She must not be cold and proud,
That will not impress the crowd;
She must talk extremely loud,
Wearing ditto dresses.
And what has she to do for it,
To do for it?
She flirts with men, some nine or ten,
A London season through for it;
Until perhaps her nerves collapse,
Or cash and credit stop;
It seems to me I'd rather be
Under a bonnet shop.