[Jo:]
I never was so thoroughly wretched
and sad in all my life,
Ah me! Alack-a-day, Alas!
[Ronald:]
It's such a nuisance having to travel
with someone else's wife.
Ah me! Alack-a-day, Alas!
[Jo:]
Though rudeness as a general thing
I very much deplore,
You'll pardon me for mentioning that
I find you such a bore!
[Ronald:]
I feel the same, but didn't see
how I could tell you so before!
[Both:]
Ah me! Alack-a-day, Alas!
[Jo:]
For six-and-thirty hours
I haven't had half a chance to flirt,
Ah me! Alack-a-day, Alas!
[Ronald:]
A honeymoon's not qute so romantic
as foolish folk assert,
Ah me! Alack-a-day, Alas!
[Jo:]
We look a most attractive young pair,
As ev'ry one agrees,
But what's the use in having a "hub"
You're not allowed to squeeze?
[Ronald:]
There's not much fun in having a wifey
who won't sit on your knees.
[Both:]
Ah me! Alack-a-day, Alas!
But we must relieve our feelings
just a little, little bit,
There are such a lot of things we want to see.
As we find it rather slow,
You and I had better go
On the spree, spree, spree, spree, spree!